A cliche fanfiction
by SuperLardBucket
Summary: Ranma has a life-changing experience and realizes he loves Akane. He sets off to fix all the problems in his life and finally have a happy ending. Wow, I sure am glad no one's ever thought to write a fic like this before...


**A cliché fanfiction**

**So, I bet you're wondering where exactly the next chapter of "Ranma: A New Ending" is… well, I haven't written it. Quite frankly, I've started the next chapter, but my passion for it waned halfway through. Try as I may, I just can't motivate myself to write anything for that story at the moment.**

**So, what does this mean? Well, it means be patient. I'm not abandoning the story, mind you. It will be back. It just means that I'm a bit bored with it at the moment. I don't start stories and not finish them (Mostly) and I assure you that this story will be done. The problem is that I'm at a part that I'm not particularly enjoying, but I have to put in for the story to continue to flow. Look at it this way people. If I force myself to write, I'll create shit, and you will hate me.**

**In the meantime, I plan on posting a lot of one-shots to bring myself out of the writer's block I'm getting over at the moment. Which brings us to this.**

**Summary: Ranma comes home to find an imposter amongst his family, and it will take all of his strength to defeat this absurd look-a-like. My own little jab at the amazing job fanfiction writers do at writing Ranma characters OOC. (Note: I'm aware the grammar and story structure aren't my usual standard. I'm doing this purposefully to mock the style of these writers.)**

It was a quiet day at the Tendo dojo…

Then Ranma came home…

"Hey everybody! I'm home"

"Oh, hello Ranma. How are you today?" Kasumi asked

"I don't have time to talk Kasumi. I just had a life-changing experience!" Ranma proclaimed.

"What kind of life-changing experience?" she asked.

"It doesn't matter, but it probably involved Akane getting mad at me…"

"Probably?"

"I've had thousands of life-changing experiences today, and I'm not sure which one I'm acting on right now. However, almost all of them began with Akane hitting me. The point is I'm a brand new man…"

"Oh my, that's wonderful!"

At that point, Akane walked in the room. "Oh, Ranma, I wasn't aware you were back. I'll be going" she said coldly, remembering whatever she was angry at him for.

"Akane, I know I can be a jerk sometimes, but I'm sorry. Please forgive me" Ranma said with perfect English, not the broken speech he normally used.

"Go to Hell!" Akane shouted. She stormed off, as Ranma was left thinking of a way to get her to forgive him. At that moment, Genma walked in.

"Hello son! Are you ready for training today? I just got done stuffing my face, because I'm so one-dimensional that all I ever do is eat, get drunk, play shougi, and make your life miserable. Never mind that I raised you, love you, and do try to help you, even if I stumble a bit. I'm just being my good ol' one-dimensional self" He stated bluntly.

"You're the worst father ever!!! I hate you!"

"Yeah well, it turns out I did something incredibly horrible, evil, and out of character like stealing you from another family, beating your mother, raping a wild animal, or something in that general nature"

"Die you bastard!!!"

At that, Ranma pounced on his father and murdered him with a switchblade, which he deserved, because he was the worst father ever and didn't care about Ranma at all.

Five hours later, Ranma knocked on her door, "Hey 'kane! Lemme in already" Ranma said in a New York accent, which apparently is the poor grammar he's supposed to speak in.

"I don't want to speak to you!" Akane shouted.

Not taking no for an answer, Ranma came in anyway."Random, generic, kind gesture" Ranma stated bluntly, representing some random, generic, kind gesture that he actually performed.

"Oh Ranma, I suddenly forgive you!" Akane stated equally bluntly.

"Remember how you said that I said I loved you?"

"Yeah!"

"Well, I never said that, but I do love you, and I want to be with you forever!"

"I love you too!"

And then they kissed in a manner that requires many fluffy, meaningless adjectives to describe.

Ranma said "You're uncute, but instead of an insult, I now mean it as a term of endearment."

Akane said "You're a pervert, but instead of an insult, I now mean it as a term of endearment"

"But for the record, I don't think we should get married…" she then added.

"I agree, even though I was totally willing to marry you a few months ago" Ranma said.

"We need to get our families off our backs…" Akane said.

"Yes, because clearly, they've somehow gained the ability to force us to get married, even though they've tried several times and always failed…" Ranma agreed. "I have a plan!" he added.

"We'll need help. We should ask Kasumi!" Akane blurted.

"Yes! Let us go forth!" Ranma shouted.

"I will help you!!! You two are so adorable!!!" Kasumi shouted, bursting out of a closet randomly.

"Good! You two deal with our fathers, I'll handle Nabiki…"

Ranma walked to Nabiki's room and knocked on her door. Nabiki opened the door.

Ranma said, "Nabiki, I am now suddenly smarter than you!"

Nabiki replied, "I still have all of these leverages over you. I will continue to exploit you for money because I am evil!!!"

"Random generic, clever trick!" Ranma stated bluntly, representing an actual random, generic, clever trick that he pulled.

"I am defeated!" Nabiki shouted, equally bluntly.

"Now you will leave me alone forever!"

"Okay," Nabiki said, "I'm going to go hook up with Kuno now!"

Meanwhile, Akane had sat down Soun and Genma (Who was back from the dead because of magic) and told them "Ranma and I are together"

"Yay! We can join the schools" they had shouted.

"But we won't get married."

"Well, it'll happen one day, so I guess I'm happy…"

At that exact moment, Ryoga burst through the wall.

"I just wanted you guys to know that I've given up on Akane, because I realize she and Ranma love each other, and instead of reacting violently like normal, I'm going to go live with Akari… Oh, and even though I always try to kill him, Ranma is my bestest friend in the whole world, and I want to be the best man… oh, and I'm P-chan…"

Akane replied, "Random, generic, violent action", representing an actual random, generic, violent action that she carried out.

Later, Ranma sat down all of his fiancées and said, "I love Akane. Leave us alone."

Ukyo cried, but forgave him. Shampoo was all like, "NO!!! RANMA LOVE SHAMPOO!!! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!" and she was breathing fire, and killing puppies, and summoning demons. And Cologne was all like, "We'll take you back one way or another son in law…"

And then Ranma was all like "Random, generic threat" representing an actual random generic threat.

"Well, fuck it, let's go home Shampoo" Cologne replied.

At that point, Kuno burst through the wall, shouting "For the record, I just learned Ranma is the pig-tailed girl, and I am disgusted. All of my other delusions have been shattered as well, which is why I'm wearing jeans and a t-shirt. But I'm alright, because I just had sex with Nabiki."

Later, Ranma came to Akane's room and said, "Everything's fixed…"

"Good" Akane replied.

"We should have sex now…" Ranma said.

"No, we should wait until we're married" Akane replied.

"Okay… actually, we should have sex now…"

"Okay…"

"Sex" Ranma said.

"Sex" Akane replied.

And for some reason, everyone forgot about Mousse, so he just wandered around aimlessly until he was hit by a truck and died a painful death because no one gives a fuck about Mousse…

**The End.**

**For the record, the end is supposed to represent sex that they actually had.**


End file.
